To come to the end of oneself and to realize that there is nothing left to hang onto.The ‘willfulness’ that got me this far, has run out. Circumstances have pushed me to a place up against a wall; the very place of miracle and rebirth. To know that all my running and planning is at an end. To turn my heart, mind and will over to the care of my Father who has been waiting patiently for me to reach the end of myself.
We saw it in the lives of Peter and Paul and others who finally ‘got it’ no more running or working off one’s own agenda. To be truly God’s person you have to come to the end of yourself.
Oswald Chambers addressed it so well…
“All our promises and resolutions end in denial because we have no power to accomplish them. When we come to the end of ourselves, not just mentally but completely, we are able to receive the Holy Spirit. The idea is that of invasion…”
There is now only one who directs the course of my life. Now that I am finally in that place I never want to leave it. My direction, purpose and will are centered outside of myself and upon Jesus and what He would have me do.
When I look back to the places of worry, fear, angst, planning and coercion that I lived in, I marvel at how He has brought me out of it and to this place of acceptance. Not an easy road to be sure, but one that step by step and doing the next right thing brought me to this place.
I thank You my Father for the miracle of coming to the end of myself and finding You there waiting to hear those words that only I can say “whatever it takes.” You put me on a better path from that moment on. You are dependable, trustworthy and true to all that You have promised. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Be with all those I love and use their circumstances to bring them to the end of themselves and to the place where they will find You there waiting. That is the greatest miracle in anyone’s life that we could ask for. Be with us all in this year with its changes, pain, problems, angst and also joy. Help us to share with each other Your faithfulness in all our circumstances so that others come to the place of relinquishment and total trust in You. Amen.
Fiona-
have lived long enough to know that I am much happier and at peace with trying to live dressed in God’s wardrobe of compassion, kindness, and being teachable with a quiet strength. I have observed people I admire live with these traits. I have seen kindness begat kindness, gentle words turn an argument around so that a resolve can be reached. Parents telling a child they are sorry for an inappropriate response, and the child learns that an adult can be real and approachable. It takes a willingness to don these clothes and live in this reality.
I heard a pastor use a visual for the word ‘abide’ that has really stuck with me. He showed a little kid’s toy, this little man inside a gargantuan robot body. When the little man wasn’t inside (or abiding) in the robot he was in his own power and susceptible to all kinds of trouble and problems. But when he climbed inside the robot body, he was able to use all the power available to him in that robots power. That is what abiding in Christ looks like. We climb into Jesus and let Him ‘live out’ in us, He is also the Power behind the work.
“Jonathan Trager and Sara Thomas met while shopping for gloves in New York. Though buying for their respective lovers, the magic was right and a night of Christmas shopping turned into romance. Jon wanted to explore things further but Sara wasn't sure their love was meant to be. They decided to test fate by splitting up and seeing if destiny brought them back together... Many years later, having lost each other that night, both are engaged to be married. Still, neither can shake the need to give fate one last chance to reunite them. Jon enlists the help of his best man to track down the girl he can't forget starting at the store where they met... Near-misses and classic Shakespearean confusion bring the two close to meeting a number of times but fate will have the final word on whether it was meant to be.” (From 